The Good Wife

The Good Woman

Proverbs 1 verses 1 to 9, 31 verses 10 to 31 and Genesis 2 verses 18 to 24
This follows on from the good man. What does it mean to be feminine? Why deal with it now? It is part of the Creation narrative. Today we have a view of the ideal woman, she is young, single and sexy, she is on the pages of magazines. Others see her as the equal in every way of men – in work etc.
What does the Bible say?
The specific cultural viewpoint
a) Today the dominant cultural view is secular feminism. This is active today. It has put right injustices of the past. In many parts of the world women are treated as inferior – for example in Muslim countries and in parts of the Far East. They are often treated as mere property. Feminism arose as a result of domineering masculinity. Feminism seeks equality. It spurns the Bible as unequal, it asserts equality and independence.
b) In much of the Christian Community it is evangelical feminism. This says that the Bible is true but sometimes the Bible is culture bound. They see the Bible as egalitarian. There is no need for male superiority or leadership.

What does the Bible say about true womanhood?

The special role is to be a helper
Unquestionably femininity has to do with handling other people. Being a helper implies ability to form relationships – see Romans 1. Look at the work of women in the home. It is vital but unseen. Soldiers cannot win a battle without good food and smart uniforms. Women by nature care and want to help. This relates to married and single women. Often they care for others. To be single is not to deny masculinity or femininity. Women are presented as being the man’s counterpart. This passage does not talk of children, she has value in and of herself.

The special quality is attractiveness.
We live in the age of laddettes, where girls act aggressively as men. They loudly assert their equality. Often girls chase boys. The Bible accepts natural beauty and it is complimented in scripture. Rebekah, Rachel, Esther, Abigail, Bathsheba etc. The Bible recognises physical attractiveness and that women try to look good. The Bible never denigrates physical beauty. The Bible however, tells us that something else makes a woman even more attractive. It is inner beauty of character.
a) True femininity is inner not outward – 1 Timothy 2 verse 10. You see love in the eyes and peace in the face. It is what is inside that makes her beautiful. The woman who is unselfish and kind has an unfading beauty regardless of age. She is not self absorbed or attention seeking.
b) True femininity is modest. 1 Peter 3 verse 4, 1 Timothy 2 verse 9. It does not matter what you wear say some. But what you wear reflects who you are. People want to make a statement. Clothes speak louder than words. What God condemns here is:
(i) Extravagance, display and flaunting of wealth
(ii) Deliberate sexual allurement
Scripture condemns deliberate allurement and to turn men’s heads and also nudity. Exposing too much flesh should be avoided. If they do they are saying their body is more important than their inner self. It does not mean women should wear a veil. A quiet and a humble demeanour is found attractive by many people. Laddettes are not found attractive by many.
c) True femininity is not assertive but submissive. The holier a woman is the more she is a woman. Femininity takes what God gives, not the not-given as Eve did.

The special function is nurturing
Men can’t bear children, some say if they could they would never have another one. True femininity found its epiphany in Mary. She gave up everything for Jesus. God has designed her to give birth, feed, protect and care for life.
a) There is no harder task than mothering. There are many facets to it. It is emotionally and physically draining. Mothers leave an indelible mark on their children – it’s an influence for good.
b) There is no higher calling than motherhood. It cannot be matched by business or politics. How many owe their success to their mothers? It influences all aspects of life – it is more powerful than politics or business.
c) There is no more blessed calling than mothering. It build adults of good character. A mother’s prayers are if great influence and importance. See the life of Augustine, his mother, Monica, prayed for him for years.
d) There is no calling more suited to any woman. Children need loving tender care surrounding them all their lives. Single women contribute to those around them.

The special calling is to a homemaker.
Proverbs 31 gives qualities and responsibilities of the homemaker. Women want to be a homemaker and care for families. Women are capable at work but want to be a homemaker. Women’s brains are made to do multiple tasks. In Proverbs 31 the woman does many things. She is very admirable and very rare, she is an ideal, a pattern, an encouragement to men to value their wives – their character and their principles. The home is a happy family home. She prays to God, she is dignified, wise and practical – she cares for the poor. She is not a trophy wife. She produces goods and earns an income. She teaches and she promotes her husband in the community and her husband values her. It is set in the culture but it shows the multi-faceted nature of a woman. This is not an autonomous or independent wife, it is a poetic picture.

The special grace is submission to husbands
In Genesis Eve asserted her independence and Adam listened to her. Submission honours and affirms her husband’s leadership. It’s not an absolute surrender of her will; it’s a disposition to yield to her husband’s guidance. Christ is her absolute authority, not her husband. She submits out of reverence to Christ. She should not follow him into sin or yield to his unbelief. She needs to stand against his unbelief.